Yea that 300lb man text is confusingly placed. IMO: didn’t build enough investment/value before soft close.

To recover, I say go for something ballsy and funny because maybe confusion can be salvaged with humor if it really lands? I might say “sorry that text was for my plug”? I don’t know if that’s funny ̄_(ツ)_/ ̄.

A humor Hail Mary that’s the strategy!

Thank you for that I am thinking a lot about it. I actually put “Single Dad. Love spending the days with my4yo daughter” in my bumble profile.

Then I just recently downloaded Tinder and made my same profile except didn’t mention kids. I mostly got Tinder to practice text game and see if there is a significant difference between profile with kids and one without. Not that I wouldn’t try to meet up with a Tinder girl, but my style now is more day game and quality girls. So far doesn’t seem to be a big difference.

I figure that is a deal breaker to some, but I don’t want to lie or not be forward about having kids.
I actually think for a lot of women that might be a DHV though? Sign of maturity, a taste of how good of a potential father I could be, and shows that the boys swim strong. Maybe not though but again, can the game be played ethically without ignoring major realities of your life? In my personal life I’ve learned to be sincere and honest almost all the time and hiding something like kids feels uncomfortable to me now.

Anyway probably overthinking again but that’s why I’m on these forums. Trying to figure out an ethical way to get into the game if there is one?

Thanks a lot, very well thought out and written. This is helping me feel better about getting back into the game.

When I was active in it I didn’t really have hesitations about LTMRs, and 90% of the time it want really an issue.

I agree that maybe I’m just being loss averse. And I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with the game. We all have to play it the way natural selection works if we want to propagate the species. So my rationalization has usually been:

1. We all have to play it so there is nothing inherently wrong with it.

2. Getting good at the game gives more opportunity, and there is nothing wrong with creating better opportunity.

3. Evolutionary psychology says that men are motivated to spread seed to the most possible so it doesn’t seem unnatural for a man to want to do that.

4. Way more women want a quick fuck or something casual more than they are willing to admit but can’t because of social conditioning,

Thanks a lot you are very helpful

Oh also a third concern is: If I am in the game for a while and I do meet the one walking down the street but she is an innocent preschool teacher type, how do I tell her about my past if she asks? If it’s love can a girl handle higher body counts?

Thank you that post is very helpful.

Yes, I already feel I’m a great father (I’m also a child psychologist that teaches parenting classes) and I have a very close bond with my daughter, that’s always a priority.

Such a cogent analysis of Mystery’s game being about performance, it seemed more about ego than connection when I watched him. Gotta give props to the legend.

So here are my ethical concerns especially as a mental health clinician:

1)If I’m seeing a girl that Is smoking hot but can already tell has some issues, and I already see this isn’t the one, and I communicate to her that we can only stay FWB, and she agrees like they all do but eventually catches feelings, and then do I eject because I’m now starting to feel shitty about it? Even if you openly communicate your intentions I still feel awful for someone who was hurt even though they shouldn’t have a reason to.

2. From the perspective of being a family man and not wanting to leave a negative impression on my daughter, dating several women and never settling down might give her the wrong image. Though I will teach her about game and how to protect herself from creeps. I guess any hookups would really be on my terms so she wouldn’t necessarily have to see many different women, but then I feel like I’m living a double life of opposites. Which seems sorta fun actually but that’s my big worry is that making the decision to get back skilled in the game versus just patiently waiting for the right one feels like a moral decision between right and wrong.

I guess if I was in your position where I would have to be a caretaker for a parent in midlife, that may be an advantage to be single and dedicate more time to caring for my mother. In clinical practice I have seen things like that deteriorate marriages.

34, divorced with 50/50 custody of 4 yo

My bad I forgot to write in divorced