Try this for a text back

“Your lack of conversational skills didn’t motivate me to get my creative juices flowing (pun intended). Do you bring anything else other than looks to the table?”

Not promising it’ll work, but you are in a pretty bad place

A few things. When she’s said “I need stimulation and jokes” you missed an easy opportunity. I would’ve said “Don’t worry, you’ll be well stimulated when I get my hands on you”

When she said “yes yes no” I would’ve said “Ah a milf”

“You sounds like a big fart” Was kinda a wierd statement. Can’t imagine that having a positive effect

Overall, you have to calibrate your text game to the girl. This one is clearly looking to fuck whole on vacation so I would’ve sexualized before going for the meet up