Severe flaking problem

10 Comments
10 Cmts
T Rex Avatar

51 Posts (+78)

485 Cmts (+266)

T Rex Avatar

51 Posts (+78), 485 Cmts (+266)

The past two months I haven't met up with a girl from tinder. I get plenty of matches to run game on, and can number close a good amount. My problems lie in setting a concrete date, I usually get ghosted after going for a meetup or get constant excuses. If I do manage to set a date, I get ghosted when I send a confirmation text and the girl flakes. Here are a couple recent examples of getting flaked on

4
Dennis Ejorh Avatar

11 Posts (+22), 395 Cmts (+179)

Hey brodie. So to be honest, the first one was suboptimal text game. When you were asked for your last name, that’s coming from a place of concern. I’ve been experimenting with responses and this one does well: “I’m not really into social media. If you want pics just ask 😏”. That way you actually tease out the concern, if there is one. Either, the pic/selfie/FaceTime/etc might be requested of you or turns out to be no big deal. But yeah, simply trolling and then ghosting is not the move.

The second one was weird, but you could have erred more on the side of empathy. 1) the proposed time was never agreed to. 2) you were given a neutral answer (“just got done with work”). 3) you responded kinda aggressively which leads to blowouts 4) you should have instead attempted to baby step the close, once again 5) you do so by finding out if they are still down to meet or would you need to reschedule 6) then throw in the trusty “what are the odds you flake again”

Hope this helps!
Cheers Bro-klahoma

3
T Rex Avatar

51 Posts (+78), 485 Cmts (+266)

Very insightful points. How do you think I should move forward with the two interactions, and do you think there is a good chance I can turn things around. Thanks brotein shake

0
Dennis Ejorh Avatar

11 Posts (+22), 395 Cmts (+179)

There’s always a chance, bro! We never say never, especially with PWF 🙂. Just gauging the two situations, the first one seems more difficult than the second, since you were literally flaked and ghosted on, which we won’t let slide 😉.

With the first situation, here’s the state of things. The underlying concern was never addressed. Most likely, you’ve given off the impression that you just wanna smash and maybe never meet/speak again. There might also be a safety concern but really in this case, you’d probably be able to get around it by showing a more genuine personality. So two things you need to do: 1) show that you’re actually not treating this as “just another notch on your belt”. 2) then pull back/ take away because this type of flaking is a no go :)
Something like: “You know, you seemed like a chill —- that I’d like to meet and see how we vibe in person. It’s okay, If you don’t wanna do this”

Usually I use “its okay if you don’t wanna do this” instead of “if you’re too nervous, I’d understand” for cases where you need to show more backbone. Since you already used one of them and haven’t heard back, go for something stronger, that might trigger “fear of loss”. So basically my recommendation is to mix, “attempt at comfort + takeaway”. A high value guy would give a reason why he chose to spend his valuable time with (insert name) but also show that he’s equally comfortable with moving on.

Now, for the second situation. Go for the reschedule. Also, you might want to try filling in more of a picture of how the hangout will be like (can’t always rely on the text work you put in already). Things like “btw, do you listen to ——?” Or even “how’s your Taco Tuesday?” Then when you get asked about yours you DHV a little and then say “picked this up for us ;)” with a picture of wine bottle. If you get the similar flakey behavior, drop the “it’s okay if you don’t wanna do this” line. At that point, you’ll find out if this is a time waster.

Hope this helps!
Cheers Bro-val Office

1
Carlton F Avatar

11 Posts (+3), 34 Cmts (+20)

set a definite time, date, and address 2-3 days ahead of time. then stop texting once the date is set. confirm once the night before the date and then confirm again the day of the date. just sloppy texting which is leaving you as just an option for these girls and not actually what they are doing that night. keep us posted on your progress, good luck!

2
T Rex Avatar

51 Posts (+78), 485 Cmts (+266)

So you prefer to send them your address immediately after setting a date, even if it's several days away?

0
avilench . Avatar

393 Posts (+1.3K), 15K Cmts (+5.3K)

first interation, she had an unanswered concern which you didnt address. In that situation you didnt give your last name, By not doing so you left her nervous and as a result she flaked. Second interation, is not a flake. She clearly still seems like she wants to meet up with you.

0
Z

10 Posts (+2), 41 Cmts (+13)

I dunno man maybe girls in some cities are harder than others but for me I find just having a genuine conversation with them rather than closing them helps. Then they see you as more genuine. Yours seem too game like and you’re just pushing hard for the close. I’m having dates come out of my ass now that I’m literally having to flake COs I’m tired out.

0
T Rex Avatar

51 Posts (+78), 485 Cmts (+266)

Post some text interactions then, curious what's working for you

0
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