How Dating Really Works (Sexual Marketplace Explained)avilench posted 3 months ago in PWF Main Group (Public Community)
There is a ridiculous amount of bullshit surrounding this topic. White knights have their reality. Pick up artists have theirs. And the manosphere community has theirs. Unfortunately, their “realities” are usually very subjective and designed to explain thier current level of results (or lack of). In this article, I’m going to break down the objective truth.
Your success in dating is going to be determined primarily by three things
- Your Sexual Market Value - looks, money, status, etc
- Your Game - communication skills, social skills, inner beliefs, etc
- Your Volume - the number of girls you talk to, the number of dates you go on, etc
Pickup artists typically overestimate #2 and disregard #1 because it is a much easier sales pitch to tell someone that they need to improve their communication skills when in reality they need to stop bieng a skinny fat slob
On the other hand, the manosphere crowd typically blows #1 out of proportion and disregards #2, because it’s much easier to accept that you’re not getting laud because you weren’t born a “Chad” and not because you’re a bitter troll with no game
In reality, each one of these is crucial on their own.
A guy with super high SMV will definitely have a lot of girls looking at him and sometimes even making the move, but if he has no game he will ruin it the majority of the time within a few minutes of opening his mouth (I’ve seen this first hand)
On the other end of the spectrum, a guy who is fat and has no status with the best game in the world, will rarely get a chance to actually use it since most girls will rarely give him the time of day
And Ofcourse, even if you’re very good looking with dope game if you never make a move or talk to girls, then you won’t get laid either
The only logical solution if you’re a man is to focus on maximizing all three of these components.
- Go to a quality barber shop and get your haircut and facial hair on point
- Dress well
- Clean up your diet to get to single digits body fat and get clearer skin
- Go to the gym regularly and put on muscle
- Chat up a lot of girls & ask then out
- Diversify amongst multiple dating apps (I use tinder, bumble, and hinge)
- Build up your own personal “brand”.
There’s a lot more of course, but those are the basics. Next, I’m going to break down how the sexual market place works. And it really is a marketplace. You are offering a product (yourself) and how in demand that product will be is going to be also determined by three things
- how much that product is in demand
- How much of that product there is
- How you’re marketing that product
For example, in America an above average looking white guy might be in moderate demand, but there is already a lot of very similar “products” so no one is gonna really notice it that much. That same guy might go to Japan and suddenly have a lot more interest and success, simply because there is a lot less of similar products there. However, if a black guy goes to japan he will have even more success, because there’s even less similar products there
A legit celebrity on the other hand will have a lot of success in America because a lot of chicks want to bang a celeb (high demand) and there’s very few celebs out there per capita (lack of competition). However, that celeb might have a bit less success in Eastern Europe because they don’t have as much of a celeb worship culture (less demand)
Let’s take a look at the dating scene for women. In the U.S and Canada if you’re an attractive girl in good shape then you’re going to be in very high demand. Every day, you will be getting hundreds of matches on tinder and dozens of guys will be sliding into your dms on Instagram.
However, if that same exact girls moved to Colombia or Brazil, she would be in significantly less demand. That’s largely in part because there are a lot more equally hot or hotter girls there (higher competition). This is partly why girls who grew up very humble and sweet in a thirds world country sometimes develop an attitude shortly after moving to the U.S
Ok so what the fuck does this mean for me?
It means that if you want to improve your dating success you have two options
- Move to a country where you will be in higher demand (eastern Europe, South America, south east Asia)
Really maximize your SMV
Or ofcouse you can do both and really crush it. (We included a detailed guide on #2 in the Online Dating Blueprint, both short term and long term.) The key here is understand how the formula works and then take massive action to maximize your odds