I feel like I am spinning wheels with online dating. I do not have alot of experience and just started researching all this about a year ago. I would not say I have gotten better with women even though I have been reading and researching alot, I would say I am more aware of what to do and the situation I am in. I had recently went on a first date, through text I was trying to flirt and playful and although she was responsive I could tell she was little dull. On the date we met up for 2 drinks on a week day happy hour. I can tell off the bat that the girl was more formal (a career women 26 who lives alone, and likes to live alone she said). I found it very hard to get the conversation to get in anyway playful sexual, although we had great conversations I can tell it was getting to platonic even though in the back of my mine I was trying very hard not to. We parted ways and I texted her next day to let her know I enjoyed the drinks. She said she did not feel a romantic connection. Can somone explain if they have any similar situations and if they can provide insight as to what this means, how would we create a romantic connection in 2 hours when she isn't open to being romantic. We basically matched had a few back and forth texts and met up, so I doubt I came off different from my texts and my photos are pretty up to date. I have had a similar instance about 1 month ago and honestly felt like the same situation and same type of women (career women/non playful/flirty) I am starting to get more experience and could tell through the texts pre date that her interest was enough to go on a date but not excited and on the date I could feel the same vibe.

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Chris Wilson Avatar

20 Posts (+44), 109 Cmts (+59)

Sometimes it just isn’t gonna happen no matter what. Not everyone is compatible. I had to go on a bunch of dates to learn how to calibrate and push/pull. Last several dates have ended with make outs and last week sex on the first date. I’m still gonna have dates that go nowhere but I’m getting better.

Not sure about your physicality but I struggled when I started because I was pretty heavy. I’m not fit bit I’m way better now which makes your flirting better received. And don’t be shy to go for the kiss if you have that long eye contact sexual tension.

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M

6 Posts (+6), 3 Cmts (+1)

I could probably loose about 20 pounds or so, I do look the same as my pictures but I do understand what you mean by how it impacts flirting. Although it is all confidence it does help when you know that you are at your best physically. Do you have any advice on gauging her intrest in getting physical after a drink or two, It does seem like certain women make it easy but the trouble I have is pushing it to flirting when it seems that they are not about it (maybe this is just in my mind and how it see her)

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Chris Wilson Avatar

20 Posts (+44), 109 Cmts (+59)

Anything can be flirting. It’s the tone and the feeling you give off. I always look for a coy smile on her face (hope I’m using coy correctly).

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