I can get from match to date easily but I have trouble getting from the date to my bed. I just got out of a long term relationship and still new to dating. So far from bumble I've gone out with 2 girls (Sarah and Lisa). With Sarah, we went out to a bar and date went well, I invited her back to my place and she said not on the first date. We made out at the end and set up a second. Second date went well at a bar. I invited her back and she said she wants to wait still but she wants another date. We made out again and she left. Third date is coming up but I'm taking her to the park this time cause the bar is too expensive. With Lisa, I took her to the bar. Date went well and I invited her back to my place but she said she wants to get to know me more first. We made out at the end and she left. Second date is coming up at another bar. Both times I had serious make out sessions with tongue and grabbing but they both want more dates first. How long does it take you guys?
28 Posts (+2), 62 Cmts (+8)
I like that approach. I can definitely see how inviting them back puts too much pressure on them and they turn it down. I mentioned something along the lines of this to my friend and he said I'd be like the candy van guy if I do that, so I didn't. But if it works for you then I should try it. I also live downtown so this is perfect. Does this work more than it fails?
So like okay you say come inside quick while I take a piss. Then you piss and then you just go for the kiss when you get out of the bathroom? And then proceed from there? Do you throw on music or a movie or something while you run to the bathroom? Or crack open a white claw or anything?
Has the girl ever said no to coming in while you use the bathroom? Or have they ever came in but not let you make advancements? Did you ever take anyone to bar 2?
35 Posts (+2), 150 Cmts (+63)
Yeah the great thing about game is that there is a lot of universal/foundational principles that work for everyone. But there are also of a lot of situational moves that just depend on your overall game/skill level. My best advice to a newbie is find out the things that work best for YOU and your current understanding/level of game.
Generally the vibe is pretty fun/flirty after the first bar, so them just coming upstairs real quick isn't a big deal. When you get into your place give her a quick tour. Make her feel at home. Have a nice boose selection and always offer a drink. Going for a kiss is really situationally dependent and I certainly don't do it willy nilly.
The great thing about being downtown is that you have a lot of flexibility. If it isn't game on right away, take your piss, have a drink and take her to the next bar. The fact that she was in your badass downtown apartment builds a huge level of comfort moving forward for the rest of the night. I also stack my bars in order of escalation. Like the first bar is always a pretty chill/quiet lounge type where we can shoot the shit and vibe. Bar 2 is always a more high energy environment. Not necessarily a night club, but live music or dance floor is preferred. This allows you to move things forward physically. Grabbing her hand/taking her for a quick dance/getting close face to face because that's the only way to hear each other over the music. All of this will build sexual tension.