This always happens to me with hot girls...
No matter how much I improve my text game, they seem to flake at the suggestion of a meetup. Screenshot of example below. Going to follow-up with a '...?' tomorrow but lmk where I may have messed up
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Go with "Dont worry, it wasn't a trick question" personally i think you went for the soft close a little to early seeing as she only really sent you 3 messages, even though they were long ones.
Don’t give away too much too quick over text. It kinda ruins the mystique and interest which is working in your favor. When she asked what made it your dream weekend, probably would have been better to say “that’s a story best told over a bottle of wine” and if she agrees to the soft close, figure out logistics and then hard close.
If I were you I’d wait a couple more days and if no response, maybe hit her up with “don’t worry, it’s not a trick question”
The best way to close is to build some comfort/investment, go for a soft close and based on her response, you either figure out logistics and hard close, or try and build more comfort.
8 Posts (+10), 580 Cmts (+268)
I agree with the messages from MS and Jamie both, your soft close was a little harder than most. As in, a soft close is her agreeing to the general idea and when you suggest drinks, it's more specific with expectations etc. Try the "Don't worry it's not a trick question" line but a couple more things.
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There are better openers to use that will have a higher response rate and get you to the same place (talking about travel etc.) remember you don't want to be generic like all the other dudes. Go for it. Hit her with a "Hey trouble" or something a little more unique.
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Keep your messages shorter, even if she is investing a lot. Don't get me wrong, contribute to the conversation, don't be dry, and always try to match her energy but don't send text after text in paragraph format, like MS said, it ruins some of the mystery and the "chase." Unfortunately, women are often most attracted to having to "earn you" and I don't mean that in a derogatory way by any means, but try to always be the buyer, not the seller. Mindset is key. Hope this helps brother.
Thanks man. To be honest though, I thought I was soft closing... How would you have soft closed it exactly?
8 Posts (+10), 580 Cmts (+268)
Looking back you did a pretty good job in terms of soft closing tbh, I might have gone with something a little more vague like "Glad you're into that as well, you seem very spontaneous" and she would respond with "Yeah etc. etc." then I might go with a "We should go on an adventure together sometime" or something like that although it's personal preference really. You did a good job. Let me know how it goes brother
Ok so to add on what alex said you didnt mess up but half of this could’ve simplified and the other half would’ve been conversation reserved for irl. Just wait.
393 Posts (+1.3K), 15K Cmts (+5.3K)
You didn't mess up dude. Give it a few days. She may reply. If not, follow up with "Don't think too hard now"
13 Posts (+13), 40 Cmts (+11)
Thanks. I used the "Hope you're not thinking too hard..." line in the beginning when she first didn't respond. Do you think it's ok to use a similar version, like "Don't think too hard now" or should I use something like "...?" or "Dont worry, it wasn't a trick question"?
8 Posts (+10), 580 Cmts (+268)
Go with the latter, you don't want to be repetitive.