Man, I feel like shit. Long story short, I just got home from an uneventful night. I was with a girl that I knew from elementary school. We have been friend when we were younger and lost contact for years. A couple months ago I texted her to see how she was doing. She is kinda cute so I was flirty and she responded well. So I invited her to my place and she accepted. The vibe was ok, we watched movies and then she stayed for the night. WE STAYED ALL NIGHT CUDDELING AND NO SEX ! She was waiting for me to make a moove but I was just frozen, trapped in my head, I could't make a move. I feel like a level 1000 pussy. But it is not finsihed. She then invited me to her place (today) and the same fucking thing happened. I don't know how to solve that issue. I just feel like a big pussboy. I feel like the girl was waiting for me to do something but I did nothing. I don't want that thing to happen again... What can I do ?
I would try to think of what it is that you're afraid of in making a move on her.
I'm not sure if I understand... you never kissed the girl even though you cuddled? IMO the easiest way to set the mood for this is to talk about sexual subjects before going for it. Anything from "when did you lose your virginity?" and "what's your favorite sex position?" are good.
I think you need to start worrying about each step of gradual escalation at a time. Like when you are cuddling start rubbing and touching her non chalantly, then step it up into more eye contact, then move up to kissing by saying something like “I really want to kiss you right now” then when you are kissing escalate by touching more and taking off her clothes slowly. It’s all about one step at a time
13 Posts (+0), 33 Cmts (+4)
Are you nervous you won’t be good?
1 Post (+2), 4 Cmts (+0)
I was in a relationship for 1 1/2 year before so I was used to things being easy. So for sure there is some nervousness but I know I'm at least decent.
5 Posts (+2), 372 Cmts (+206)
You're gummed up inside, so I'm going to share a mighty technique to unstick you or unstick the both of you.
Go here, watch the video on the 3 minute game, memorise the 2 questions. https://bettymartin.org/how-to-play-the-3-minute-game/
Next date when you've settled in, "hey I saw this youtube video on the power of positive touch, it could be a bit silly but I want to try it out, are you in? it's like this ..."
Then you both use your words to say what you want and get consent. 3 minute game is a good excuse for you both to get sexual, and a powerful ritual for you to learn how to ask for what you want.
393 Posts (+1.3K), 15K Cmts (+5.3K)
yeah man. You recognize the problem. Unfortunately, none of us can take action for you. You have to force yourself to get over your fear of escalation and make a move. I can tell you this. The more you do it, the easier it will get. And, the more you pussy out, the worse you will feel about yourself and the less women will respect you