I attended a hotel party that was organized by an acquaintance named Owen. The ratio of females to males was about 50/50, which is terrific so I will likely attend events by him in the future. He invites a lot of the same people to the parties, of course, some people can't make it and some new people come in. I was able to get some names and numbers, but could not achieve more than a few consensual ass grabs.
I will mention one girl (Jacynda) that was a tricky situation. Before I get into the details, it is probably relevant to note that Jacynda is white but she was introduced to this party scene by a 6' 4" black guy. I did not know this until later on. We first met in the lobby when I saw her dancing very sexy with another girl and a white guy who was clearly interested. She seemed kind of bored with him so I talked to her briefly and complimented her dancing.
During the daytime, we hung out in a 3 on 3 group with 2 guys I just met and 2 of her female friends. We were in the hotel swimming pool for 2 hours and I talked to Jacynda off and on and got her to laugh. Eye contact started to improve. Didn't go for the physical contact because I didn't have context for it. I decided my best bet would be for us all to get dinner together as a group of six. I focused my efforts on her because I mostly cared about getting her to come and friends seemed like would either come along or let her go with us (no cockblock anticipated).
Well...curveball...she barely knew these 2 female friends. She had just met them hours before. That's why they weren't cockblocking. It turns out while she was telling me she "didn't know her dinner plans," she was soon to get that invite from the aforementioned extremely handsome black gentleman.
Text exchange occurred after we left and Jacynda thought I was funny and said the black guy was cool and chill when I texted her about her being with him. I saw her go up to his room one night in addition to getting dinner with him so she is sort of downplaying her involvement with him. She is, however, single so it seems like a cock carousel situation for her. I will probably see her again in the summer. Is there anything further I could text her? Is this a lost cause as a short white guy? Keep in mind I got numbers from other girls who were far more compliant, but where I genuinely failed to close that night. So I am definitely not putting all my eggs in her basket.
44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)
I would disregard her connection with the black guy, that really doesn't matter. You didn't close the other girls, which I think is why Jacynda wasn't more into you. Remember, what women say doesn't have any weight vs what they actually do. Women say all kinds of shit to make themselves look better. And it seems like you're making Jacynda a priority, when you are the point of origin. Hold frame, and to that end, text her whenever the hell you feel like it (although not too much) meaning go after what you want without attachment to outcome. That's a recipe for success. Always be confident about escalating, and when girls don't accept your escalation then view that as an opportunity to respond with indifference, to hold frame, and this will make you even more attractive to the women who initially 'reject' you. You had balls, you went for it without hesitation, and when you got a 'no' you were like 'meh, whatever, next' - do this genuinely, and you'll be unstoppable.
11 Posts (+5), 23 Cmts (+1)
I was definitely putting effort into Jacynda, which I hope will pay off later on. I'm not sure what you mean by "when you are the point of origin." I take that as I am expressing interest and spending time on her, but she pulls away and has other commitments. It seemed like I was a backup dinner plan for her, unfortunately. I could have been more outgoing or flirtatious, but I felt I wasn't getting enough back from her.
When she told me she was getting dinner with someone else, I said, "Oh damn, really? You're not coming with us?" Is there a better reply I should use in the future?
Yes, one of things that helped me was I got phone numbers quickly as the event was just starting, so I had that running in the background while I talked to other girls. My mistake was failing to close higher probability targets. I left them unattended while someone was chattering too long with me, and another guy sat down next to her. Another situation - shorter girl recognized me on the dance floor and approached in a friendly way. I hugged her, danced briefly but left the perimeter open and another guy got all up in that and soon left with her.
More successful example with the same girl - a guy grabbed her ass and I followed up immediately and did the same in a confident manner. She then sat down next to me, but I neglected to sexualize any further.