Hot girl approaches me in convenient store
Some crazy shit happened the other day. I just woke up and I’m getting coffee at a counter, asocial mood, headphones in,bundled up for winter weather, back facing the rest of the store and all of a sudden this absolutely stunning girl quickly comes up to me, reaches over to grab something in front of me, looks straight in my eyes and smiles. I was startled and I say “hey how are you” she says “good how are you” pretty basic but the way she acted and her voice tone told me it was on.. she pays at the counter and I’m behind her and run out while she’s getting in her car. She’s smiling with her mouth wide open the whole time and the first thing she says is “do you come here a lot? I can’t believe I’ve never seen you before” she asks where we live she puts her # in my phone the whole interaction was phenomenal. We both leave for work and I text her when I get home. Starts off good.. quickly dissipated and I get left on read when I go for the date. I run into her today (2 days later) she apologizes for not answering and says she’s been busy. Convo is ok and at one point I suggests meeting at the bar next door that night. Too busy. Another night this week. Too busy. I tell her to Hmu when she figures it out. That interaction was meh.. they keep happening in the morning before coffee and before work and I’ve been walking on eggshells prior to this because I keep blowing amazing interactions with texting. Like 12 in a row that should be layups
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No person no matter how busy they are has no time for a date or to do something they want. Thats the key word here -"want". She isn't really invested. She is just being nice. Try to banter with her some more, get her to respond with longer messages, use voice memos and try setting up some face time. Find something she likes to talk about - fitnes, travel, movies, cooking... just because it's normal topics it doesn't mean it's boring. It's how you vibe, over something you both like. Here you are soft closing on zero investment. If none of this works just move on. Do not get stuck on one girl when there are plenty out there.
Cool, what’s a good message to get the ball rolling again in this instance? This is my first post here. My approach was that she was investing a ton in person so I would go for the same night date and try to strike while the iron was hot
If she doesn't respond to your last message then wait 2 days and send her the "if you are too nervous, I'd understand" text. That should get the convo rolling again. But remember it is really important you wait a few days to text her again if she doesn't respond to your last message.
8 Posts (+10), 580 Cmts (+268)
Your text game is ok, the witty messages are good but you need to be more concise and get more investment from her before you soft close and then lock-on time and date etc.
Goodluck bro
Update everybody. I ran into her like 5 more times and left my headphones in and let her initiate every single time and do all the work. When we’d chat I would flirt subtly, pass little shit tests, and be the first to leave. The last time I saw her I elbowed her and said I’d catch her later. She didn’t want me to leave and when I went to my car she rushed out behind me and ripped off her mask. She had a smirk, as I was pulling out she stood behind my car with a big smile and was waving. I saw it all in my rear view mirror. I decided it was enough investment from her to initiate another text interaction if I didn’t hear from her within a half hr. I did and she replied in under a minute. Texts were going great until I sent 2 bad voice notes getting ahead of myself and too comfortable 😐. She didn’t reply and I believe she went to another store to avoid me. Every time I’ve gone here since I met her I have seen her. I think I may have fucked it up for good. Had 2 other great interactions yesterday leading to #s and fucked both of them up as well. Feels bad man, I ruin it every time
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This was before I ran into her again. She apologized for being busy and said no to tonight and maybe to sometime this week. It was a fairly unconvincing maybe. Remember this girl initiated the interaction and was super interested when we met in person. Just odd
8 Posts (+10), 580 Cmts (+268)
It might have been something where she just wanted attention or it was one of those in the moment things but she didn't feel the same afterward or maybe she was just being really friendly, who knows man
9 Posts (+5), 212 Cmts (+56)
You have very good texting... The teasing, the eloquence and the closing are all good.
At the end of the day, whether she picked you up or not, if she was emotionally available and interested, she'd make a date with you...
Heck, even if she was a mental fruitloop but really liked you, she would've made a date with you!
Just move on and keep picking up women 👋
Ok so what I’m saying is, I’ve been doing pickup for about 6 months steady with many interactions. Game for 2 years or so (poorly). Of every girl I’ve ever encountered in my entire life (pickup or not) this girl showed more interest on first meeting than ANY. Is this clear enough? Lol
IVE NEVER HAD A GIRL SHOW MORE INTEREST THAN THIS GIRL ON FIRST MEETING
I’ve already moved on and have done more approaches. I just can’t seem to communicate this and it is frustrating
My analysis is this, I waited too long to text her (9 hrs this happened before we both went to work)
My texting was too gamey
Torero has said that once a girl is down and hooked there is no need for wit or game and that you are more likely to fuck it up or turn her off. I was aware of this before texting her but it still came across gamey.
She was embarrassed by how forward she was..
I’ve encountered this problem many times dealing with girls. You work up their interest and excitement so much before meeting that the only place for it to go is down and it leaves them feeling self conscious of how they acted and they withdraw. ASD. Anti-slut defense. This has happened at least 3 times recently.
I’m also convinced this girl saw me many times because her approach seemed calculated, she looked familiar, and her first words before even an introduction were “I can’t believe I’ve never seen you before”
She saw me before we go to the same spot every morning. She saw me when I was in a better headspace and more confident (which would have been any day other than the one we met) I was feeling particularly terrible that day and her expectations could have also not been met as I was incongruent from my normal outgoing self at this location
9 Posts (+5), 212 Cmts (+56)
First, it wasn't too gamey, you were just making a normal conversation.
Second, it wasn't her "Anti slut defence" that got her not to go out with you
When attraction is present, no amount of reasoning will be able to persuade her NOT to hangout with you... attraction is not a choice.
What you're saying makes no sense "Her interest was so high there wasn't room for it to grow, so it could only go down"
You're just rationalising things because as men we're logical beings, our rational mind takes over and creates reasons for why this and that happened.
So don't take things personally if they don't work out, sometimes the problem comes from the girl you're interacting with.
6 Posts (+0), 8 Cmts (+2)
Build more excitement for her. If she's hot she has her pick of many guys. Give her a reason to want to pick you. Send of a photo of you doing something cool. Don't text her back for a couple of days or a week. You're busy and you don't have time to chase.
Most importantly, remember hot girls are everywhere. When I give less of a fuck than the girl does, I have much better results. The moment she picks up on neediness or she feels that you're chasing her, her buying temp will drop like a rock. The one who cares the least wins.
2 Posts (+2), 24 Cmts (+1)
I’m having a lot of frustration because I knew my approach was suboptimal before meeting this chick and made a conscious effort to avoid my usual texting pitfalls but I play it “safe” by going back to the framework I learned from the London daygame model and it hasn’t been working for me lately.
2 Posts (+2), 24 Cmts (+1)
I guess the thing driving me fucking mad is that I can’t escape this issue.. I know about this issue and it’s fucking with my head so I make a conscious effort to take a break and this girl inserts herself into that space and then it still goes nowhere. I’ve been doing approaches for months and I have loads of interactions that went awesome, high investment with text and it goes nowhere and I thought stepping back for a month and getting my mind off it might help and then this shit happens and now ima have to run into this chick everyday