Had one great date. Not sure why no response yet. Don't wanna make an error here

16 Comments
16 Cmts
L

44 Posts (+21)

550 Cmts (+363)

L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

At End of Hinge conversation, she had taken 3 days to get back to me confirming that she wanted to meet Tuesday night. She was very much of the mindset of screw a lot of texting, let's meet irl.

She was kind of thick and smelled like hippie patchouli, but I felt genuine attraction and she definitely did...when I kissed her at multiple venues, I always broke it off first and she was still leaning in for more. Lots of touching. Referring to "us" and "we should totally ( this and that) together". Closed down 2nd venue at 2am. In her car, wild makeouts and feeling each other up. It's so hot that I hadn't even been thinking sex tonight, but gently suggested it "um ..we could go back to your place if you want" and she smiled and said 'i don't think we should tonight ' and I agreed "yeah it's a first date, we should save something for later". Makeout continued for a minute then I broke it off with her still leaning in and I said goodnight...almost fell asleep in the car lol and texted her the šŸ”„ thing when I got home at almost 3am.

It just seemed so certain she was down to hangout again that I did the last text yesterday at 2pm. I'm surprised she hasn't responded yet and am seeking advice on what to do now.

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G

39 Posts (+8), 697 Cmts (+226)

Bummer. Alex actually pointed this lesson out to me, and when I observed my results, I realized how accurate it was: If I don't close on the first date, the chance I see a girl for the second date goes down dramatically. I think a bit of backwards rationalization can happen in a girl's mind "Why didn't anything happen? Were there no sparks?..." Even if it was her who was slowing down the escalation, and wanting to wait. This has been a frustrating lesson to learn, as I actually enjoy waiting and letting some tension build.

I also tend to not open with attempts to make plans on the first message. I try to build to that more smoothly. Sorry this one didn't work out (yet, could still pull through). Start with a bit of small talk, preferably a reference to something that happened on the date, like an inside joke

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L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

Hey man really appreciate the response. I know a lot of guys have that experience where if they don't close, they never see her again but this has not been my experience. Would be the first time in ages that's happened if she does just disappear now. Yeah, I could have reengaged with banter and pleasantries, in fact I probably should've done that. Would you switch to small talk now, unprompted? Also - I now have a Sun night date booked and a possible Mon night date with someone who wants to see me but logistics are iffy for next week, and Mon is the only possibility...she might have tickets to a major event so if that doesn't happen we were gonna meet. I was thinking of texting Lauren "shit my bad, I can't do those nights it turns out. But I felt real chemistry with you, I want to see you again ". What do you think about this as well?

Edit: btw her SMV is definitely Below mine. When feeling her up, she is definitely overweight. Disguised it nicely with her attire. Has drawn on eyebrows. Piercing that I don't like and is kinda low class. Yet I still want to bang her lol

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G

39 Posts (+8), 697 Cmts (+226)

I personally would just wait a couple of days from the last text, and say "don't be shy now". I think it comes off a bit obvious to take an offer back that she hasn't responded to, or to go to small talk and undermine the fact that she didn't respond to your request for another date. I think that you need to get to the bottom of her hesitation first

2
L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

Context: glasses. As you can see, Not that hot. Thick. End of hinge conversation included here, with 3 day delay. But the way she kisses and touches is šŸ”„ like she's devouring something with urgency lol

This one's got me confused.

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L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

Update: just created a Sun night date with a new match who's younger and better looking. Seems solid.

Have another 45 year old match very very interested for Monday or Tuesday. And 2 other women I've had 1 date with that I'd like to schedule a 2nd date those nights too

0
L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

If she doesn't respond, and I can set up either a Sun or Mon night with another woman, would it be a mistake to proactively text Lauren here "oops, can't do Sunday" a propos nothing? Or just don't follow up, and if Lauren comes back like "sorry for the delay! Sunday is good :)" I would Have to say sorry, I hadn't heard back and something came up. Thoughts??

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Adam M Avatar

241 Posts (+29), 326 Cmts (+77)

Go through rotations

0
L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

Honestly don't know what you mean

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Adam M Avatar

241 Posts (+29), 326 Cmts (+77)

Arrange other dates

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JenYu T Avatar

12 Posts (+9), 229 Cmts (+105)

Looks to me like she needs more out of the texts. Girls are gonna find any reason to ignore you. Its the same problem I highlighted in your last post I commented on. Im gonna be posting more of my texts soon. You'll be able to see how I spice it up. Most often I;m using what I call command statements (telling the girl, what, where, and how things are/ will happen), Irony (saying something that contradicts or doesnt make sense in the frame of you flirting with her Ex: Saying she is beautiful then sending the barf emoji, and Questions + Flattery; I call this charm in my notes)

For now tho, Id just re-engage again. The date was fire so no need to overthink it too much yet outside of what I said at the beginning. I'd personally say, "I've given you permission to respond now". This would be an example of a Command line as I stated earlier.

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L

44 Posts (+21), 550 Cmts (+363)

Really appreciate you taking the time to read my posts and comment thoughtfully on them

In this case, we talked and drank and made out for 5.5 hours, so I don't think this is a situation of needing spicier texts or more from texts generally. She's 33, 2 preteen kids, their dad not in the picture, and hinge profile is classified "long term relationship, open to short" and she personally added "staying hopeful until I meet the right one" under that.

Again, she's a veryyy little bit of a low level crazy ratchet nurse whose SMV is def below mine. The makeouts kinda verified that, if that makes sense.

I think if anything, Id need more comfort and "no expectations if we get together a 2nd time" type of message. I probably come off very smooth, caddish in person even tho my in-progress text game is less playerish than most guys here. So I can't imagine any other plausible reason she's ignoring me. Thanks again bro

Edit: and all that said, if her ignoring me is meant to get inside my head...well, it clearly worked 🤦

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JenYu T Avatar

12 Posts (+9), 229 Cmts (+105)

It be like that sometimes but where would the fun be if we didn't get hung up on the girls sometimes right lol. I wish you the best of luck and tag me if you ever want my feedback or thoughts on something

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