Was good y'all, I've noticed I started to make some progress with my textgame and so far it's been a smooth sail. I rarely request assistance from the forums, but I honestly need some advice here. The context is that this is a girl from Instagram, We vibed, got to know each other, built sexual tension and I'm now going for the close. I thought there were two redflags because she didn't want to give her number out and it was the fact she was overly suspicious (But I found out the reason for this, except for the why she won't share her number.) It starts off like: Her: So when is it then? Me: Soon. What's your schedule like Her: School then golf then homework mon-thurs I work on fridays after school and I work on saturdays what's your schedule like Me: Same thing here, I'm free around 4 on Friday and Thursday Her: Oh cool, alright So when? Me: Let's do thursday. Say 5? Her: mm I think I have a * on thursday how about friday you meet me at my work then we can talk Me: That's cool, where is this "Work" of yours Her: ** Me: Ah, 3 stars her: * Me: How about this, I'll make you a deal... Her: What's the deal Me: You come to * this time, and I'll come to you next time Her: Where is * I'm really bad at navigation And how do I know you won't kidnap me Me: Oh jeeze, I'm super laid back, just bring some pepper spray lol Her: U r kinda suspicious lmfaoo Me: Lol you're good, I gave up kidnapping for life Her: Huh that doesn't make sense! but you're still so suspicious lmfaoo Me: I'm curious, now why's that Her: you are just very rather odd.. Me: Is this about the way I text or.. Her: Kinda I think you are a very cool guy though (Thumbs up emoji at the end) Me: Honestly, I'm just a very upfront and direct type of guy. And plus, I'm even cooler to meet in person Her:I think you are low key weird but I'd like to get to know you! Me; Yea same. Shoot me your number for romance arrangement purposes. Her: Ayo. also lmk why you take an hour to respond to cause why do you open it then leave me on opened and then respond Me: Had to build up the suspense ;) Her: It is very suspenseful and rather suspicious.. Me: More like just a busy guy. I prioritize sports over everything nowadays. And is that really so suspicious now Her:mhmm yeah and how do i know that your pictures are some off the internet lmfaoo you honestly seem like a perfect guy that's why it's so suspicious Me: I know, I'm too good to be true 😏 But yeah, we can facetime for a couple minutes Her: Yes, we should there's just no way you're real me: That's better. Text me ** Her: Or we can call on instagram plus you're getting better at responding ;) Me: Of course babe, i'm just not really active on here much, l would just prefer to move this whole thing to text, it's way easier Her: 🤨 Me: If you're into that sorta thing Her: I'm not sure I'm comfortable sending my number yet Me: If you're too shy, I'd understand her: Nah, I'd feel like you'd take my number and track me down" What do I say here, I feel like I could if I wasn't so emotionally exhausted from using my all my energy to talk to this chick. @avilench .
10 Posts (+1), 471 Cmts (+173)
4 Posts (-1), 50 Cmts (+18)
Well, it's good to trust your instincts, and I'm only an outsider looking in. You're likely more familiar the situation than I am (this is just a slice of context you've shared), but from what I can I see--at face value--she's telling you you're "low key weird" and that your response "didn't make sense", and while it's ok to take long to reply, that's generally when there's a legit reason. What was your reason here? Because you were asking other people what to say next? Women tend to have good instincts, why wouldn't she sense something is off? Like, that's not generally considered common behavior--and certainly not "alpha" behavior.
That isn't to say that you did anything wrong though. It seems like you're still in the process of learning your text game and there's nothing wrong with the approach you've taken. I think it's just worth pointing out though that this approach will not always work, and definitely not long term. Having default responses it normal, but if they're not YOUR default responses that may end up being incongruent.
As for what I would have done different. I think the big anchor point was when she expressed that she was willing to get to know you. At that point I would have given her the chance to. Seems like you hadn't quite built up attraction (likely because your profile is lacking--an attractive profile can do most of the work for you) and was asking you to pretty much display some more value. Instead though, you persisted in a negative way.
10 Posts (+1), 471 Cmts (+173)
Oh ok makes sense. When you say that you would have given her the chance to know me, what would you have said exactly. Like, Display some value? And then what would you have done differently at the end where I persisted negatively? Would you have persisted? Kenneth D